- Consider themselves well dressed if their socks match.
- Buy their spouses a set of matched screwdrivers for their birthday.
- Wear moustaches or beards for "efficiency". Not because they're lazy.
- Have a non-technical vocabulary of 800 words.
- Think a "biting wit" is their fox terrier.
- Know the second Newton's Law - but not their own shirt size.
- Repair their own cameras, telephones, televisions, watches and automatic transmissions.
- Say "It's 70 degrees Fahrenheit, 25 degrees Celsius, and 298 degrees Kelvin" and all you say is "Isn't it a nice day"
- Give you the feeling you're having a conversation with a dial tone or busy signal.
- Wear badges so they don't forget who they are. Sometimes a note is attached saying "Don't offer me a ride today. I drove my own car".
- Politics run towards acquiring a parking space with their name on it and an office with a window.
- Know the "ABC's of Infrared" from A to B.
- Rotate their tires for laughs.
- Will make four sets of drawings (with seven revisions) before making a bird bath.
- Briefcases contain a Phillips screwdriver, a copy of "Quantum Physics", and a half of a peanut butter sandwich.
- Don't find the above at all funny.
Submitted by: Jesse M. Guthrie